There are experiences in life after which we may say, “I have never been quite the same.” Sometimes the change follows an obvious trauma: violence, abuse, the death of someone we love, war, betrayal, abandonment, or another experience that overwhelms our capacity to absorb what has happened. At other times, the loss is quieter. A child learns that a particular gift is unacceptable. Someone repeatedly suppresses an essential part of themselves to remain connected to a family o